assigned tasks at my work have a little blue frowny face on them in the system to mark them as “not completed” until I go in and select that I have completed them. but I have the whole week’s worth of tasks listed, so I can’t make the final frowny faces go away until tomorrow. this bothers me.
captioning PBS, freaked out by Kim Barker’s eyeballs.
This is my new (first) tattoo.
It is a representation of my belief in the ability of the human consciousness, existing here on the auspices of a universe of chance and chaos, to create stories. Stories that repeat. Stories that go in cycles. Stories that come in threes. Stories of gods and witches and heroes and animals and tricksters and humans and storytellers. We are the only ones we know of who tell, listen, and read stories. Who structure our lives in terms of narratives. It is a tattoo with many meanings, but the most important meaning is that the longer you think of it, the more stories you can come up with. Stories of rings and circles. Of infinities and zero. Of layers and histories and shapes and ghosts. Because you are human, and, like me, your brain cannot help but tell stories.
Can I make a prediction? You will explain all that to strangers at parties so many times that you get bored and start telling them you’re an archery fan.
becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys:
Hello, Tumblrs! So I wish to test a hypothesis.
I reckon that everyone in the world has expertise in something. Or, not expertise, maybe that’s too strong, since it suggests a qualified level; but I think everyone in the world is knowledgeable about something. I think everyone has something, some field of life, no matter how academic or vocational or “banal” or “worthy” they or others may think it is, that they’ve invested a lot of their time and interest in over the years and now know a lot about. Maybe they have more than one thing.
So you - yes, you, the person reading this, into whose eyes these words are going - I would like to know what yours is. Do you know a lot about ancient Greek hymation styles? Could you hold a seminar on how to reshape eyes with the power of make-up? Are you so well-versed in plumbing that you have eighteen different words for ‘spanner’?
What would you say you know a lot about?
I don’t know, I feel like I know a little about a lot of things rather than a lot about anything. My shoggoth, on the other hand, has an encyclopedic knowledge of so many bits of modern history (especially the history of left wing movements) I would never use wikipedia except he always tries to make me guess things instead of just telling me.
Actually, this isn’t really a ~knowledge~ field, but if anything could be called my area of expertise I would say it is the process of “translating english into english”, I am very good at figuring out what people are trying to say and what other people are actually hearing instead. Also if I keep this job long enough I will know more than anybody needs to about television news programs.
If dudes are expected to have a lot of sex
But ladies are expected to stay virgins until marriage
But homosexuality is bad
I’m really confused who dudes are supposed to be having all that sex with
Well, traditionally, prostitutes, or if you were well-off, the maid. Not by her choice. To ‘get experience’.
No, no, Raph, you’re missing the point. It’s not a history question, it’s a logic puzzle.
The answer is clearly “other people’s wives”
today my friend tumblr user shorelle graduated from her design course! she had a spiffy ipad portfolio and there was cider and cheese. i ate a lot of cheese, i had neglected to dinner. then afterwards we all went to like some fancy pizza restaurant and I was like “but i ate all the cheese.”
then we were the least classy people in the restaurant and it was great. tumblr user voigtlander knocked over a $45 bottle of wine that nobody voted for by gesticulating wildly, which was my fault for mentioning duck penii. it was grate
The problem with voice recognition is that humans do not pause between words when speaking normally, so it has to guess where the edges are. Sometimes it guesses wrong, which messes up its context recognition. Then it tells you that David Beckham may end his foot wall in Korea.
9gag:
Let’s give it a shot.
And as he was feeling rather sad, remembering his small abandoned planet…
SEEMS LEGIT
I say we give her a chance. Lyra?
“Aye, nae wonder, ‘cause here’s a bear!”
“If a real war does start, and if all the Wolman tribes ever unite against us, we’re dead.”
I choose to interpret “death” as “little death” and “war” as “orgies”
- Alexander: I got a commendation!
- Me: What?
- Alexander: An old lady called up to say what a good job I was doing delivering her mail. She said I was efficient, cheerful and courteous!
- Me: Aw.
- Alexander: Except we don't have a form for that, so my supervisor called me in and went "Alexander, we have receieved the strangest complaint..."
When you live on a barely hospitable desert island that was once a continent-sized penal colony, your life tends to be a little more badass than the average person’s.
oh my god the emu picture links to my blog. I’m going down in history as the girl who comments on emus. that and “i dunno, i think it might be a bit more complicated than that” are my most popular posts. TUMBLRRRR
just ate half of the worst avocado chicken salad roll ever. I know mayo is great with chicken, but it’s supposed to be dressing, not soup.
is anyone else interested in the way “what do?” has had a linguistic shift from meaning exclusively “i don’t know what action to take right now” to also being used as e.g. “what are you doing”? I’ve found myself using it using the latter a lot.
tumblr: where it is quite tricky to post about an obscure book series you liked without discovering that somebody else has fond memories of it as well.
becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys:
Oh my god oh my god oh my god WAITIs this part of the Warlock In Spite of Himself series? Because I read that and King Kobold the sequal and I was not aware there were more so it is vital I know if these are the same books under different names or if there are more that I need to hunt down. Quick, the AI robo horse - is it epileptic? And called Fess?
YES IT IS. I have just read the bit where they meet it for the first time, it is a dodgy spaceship atm because its original drunk owner sold it for scrap after it had a circuit burned out trying to save him from an asteroid. YES.
(Source: thegreatgodum)
